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Why Mickelson might skip PGA Grand Slam of Golf

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ATLANTA – According to some reports, Phil Mickelson passed on this year’s PGA Grand Slam event in Bermuda because of the psoriatic arthritis that slowed him for much of the second half of the season.

Perhaps, but Lefty still plans to play the Ryder Cup and two events in Asia before calling it a year. While waiting around East Lake “Shag Bag” came up with some other possible reasons why the Masters champion will skip the exclusive event for the season’s four major champions:
  • Word that the PGA of America will grandfather the use of old Ping wedges with non-conforming grooves.
  • Rumors that Rees Jones recently redesigned the host course Port Royal Golf Club (actually, Robert Trent Jones Sr. redesigned the course in 1970, but Lefty has not been as critical of Senior’s handiwork).
  • An early-week pro-am.
  • The San Diego Chargers are at home that week.
  • The Padres are back in the pennant race.
  • Tiger Woods plans to be in the gallery.
  • There are no towering pines or pine needles adjacent fairways at Port Royal like there were at Augusta National’s 13th hole.
  • There are no veggies on the entire island for the new vegetarian, only conch fritters.
  • He doesn’t look good in Bermuda shorts.
  • PGA officials plan to break any ties with a spelling bee of competitor’s names and, in Lefty’s defense, no one can spell Louis Oosthuizen if you spot them two vowels.
  • Hal Sutton is making the pairings.
  • Someone told him Port Royal was a links course.