'It's the reality. I'm not good enough and now I know it. I have tried for 13 years, thinking I can win. I don't know what happens to me. I'm not good enough for the majors. That's it. You can live without a major.' – Sergio Garcia, after his third-round collapse at the Masters that took him out of contention at yet another major championship.
'Just got off the phone with Luke. NOT disqualified. Thanks goodness.'' – Tweet from Luke Donald’s wife Diane, on the world’s No. 1 player possibly being ruled ineligible for the rest of the Masters due to a smudge on a faxed copy of his first-round scorecard.
'I would say each ticket was in roughly 20 pieces.' – Russ Berkman, who made his dog vomit up his four Masters tickets when he discovered that she ate them the day before he was leaving for Augusta National. Fortunately, Masters ticket officials issued him new passes when they heard the story.
'That was a trainwreck finish at the last; I seem to be rolling up snowmans here now and again.' – Henrik Stenson, on a disastrous quadruple-bogey 18th hole in the first round of the Masters that dropped him out of the lead.
'Can I win? I believe I can, yes. It would be a walk-off. I am dead serious when I say that. You won't see me again. What a way to go.' – Fred Couples, assessing his chances of winning the Masters after leading through two rounds, on the 20th anniversary of his first victory.
'I don’t think any of us can see that far, we can hear them all land though.' – Jack Nicklaus, on the length of the ceremonial first tee shots hit by himself, Arnold Palmer, and Gary Player to kick off the 76th Masters on Thursday. It was reported that Player hit the farthest drive.
'You're kidding. No flowers? I can't believe that.' – Ian Poulter, on the lack of the red, pink and white azaleas that typically adorn Augusta National’s grounds. Due to Mother Nature, most of the flowers had wilted by the start of the Masters.
'It’ll make dinner taste a lot better tonight. I wanted to at least finish even par, and birdieing the last was really nice. I’m definitely happy coming off the course in red numbers.' – Rory McIlroy, on carding a first-round 71 at the Masters – his first round at Augusta since blowing a four-shot lead in the final round last year.
'Tomorrow morning the headlines, I think, will be dominated by a 52-year-old man who has never changed his golf swing and a 36-year-old man who changes his golf swing more than Cher changes outfits at one of her concerts.' – Brandel Chamblee, on Fred Couples and Tiger Woods heading into the weekend at the Masters.